The V Word
by glitterpop
Summary: LJ. It begins with a challenge from her sister: Lily must shag a bloke before Christmas. But when things don't go as planned, she finds her feelings for James Potter may be developing into something different, something real.
1. Chapter 1

**THE V WORD**

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Disclaimer: It's all JKR's.

Warning: This story contains questionable (ha) language and sexual material. Probably nothing _too _graphic, but consider yourself **warned.**

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PROLOGUE

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She would later claim that the whole thing was entirely the fault of her sister. Her sister would sniff haughtily and say that she had no part in it whatsoever. Her best friend would maintain that it was simply an unavoidable culmination of a decade's-worth of sibling rivalry.

Let the records show, it began with a shriek.

"Lily! Get this demonic contraption out of the sink before my mates come over!"

Stifling a giggle, Lily Evans took her time walking into the kitchen where her distressed sister was standing with her arms crossed and pointedly avoiding staring at the large cauldron that was sitting freshly scrubbed in the sink.

"Oh bugger, how could I have forgotten?" she exclaimed overdramatically. "Thanks ever so much for reminding me."

Her mocking did not go unnoticed by Petunia, who threw her hands up in irritation and belted out the age-old: "_Mum_!"

"What is it, dear?" Their mother appeared at the doorway, balancing a basket of laundry on one hip.

Petunia pounded a fist on the counter. "Lily is purposely trying to embarrass me in front of my mates!"

"Oh, don't be so melodramatic, Tuney," Lily said, lifting her cauldron out of the sink and preparing to lug it into the other room. "Oh, wait," she declared loudly, fishing her wand out of her pocket. She then proceeded to levitate it out of the room, much to the distress of her sister who flailed an arm in Lily's direction.

"You see?" Petunia shrieked. She had been extra sensitive towards any magic-making ever since Lily had come home for the summer as an official adult in the Wizarding world.

Their mum rolled her eyes at her daughters' antics and turned towards Lily. "Darling, are you planning on changing before we go to the station?"

Lily looked down at her rather drab outfit. "What's wrong with what I have on?"

"Nothing, nothing, I just figured you'd want to look extra nice for whatever young man you wanted to impress."

Petunia snorted, making her appear more horse-like than usual. "Lily doesn't have any experience with boys, Mum."

Their mother shot her a disapproving look. "Petunia, play nice with your sister." Petunia smiled in return until she left to sort the laundry.

"As if _you_ have experience," Lily replied once their mother was out of earshot.

Petunia sniffed. "I have loads more than you. When's the last time you've had a boyfriend? Face it, Lily, you're a virgin in every sense of the word."

"Well that's rich!" Lily sneered. "I know for a fact that you've never shagged anyone."

Petunia looked away haughtily, but didn't say anything, confirming her accusation. "Well," she finally said, "we all know I'd be the first to shag someone out of the two of us."

This was simply too much for Lily's competitive nature to handle. "Care to put that to the test?"

"Fine," Petunia said. "First one to shag a bloke wins."

Lily cocked a brow. "How can I trust you not to lie?"

"Then we'll have to offer some sort of proof," her sister answered simply, as if she participated in de-virginizing competitions all the time.

Lily decided this would have to do for now. She figured there would always be some kind of spell she could look up to determine the winner if she needed to. "Fine, but we'll have to do it when I come home for Christmas."

"Sounds good to me," Petunia said, sticking her nose up in the air, a familiar position. "I already have it in the bag, anyways."

Lily's eyes narrowed. "What makes you so sure?'

"There's a lad a few blocks down who's keen on me."

"That Dursley boy?" Lily barely managed to stifle a snort. "I doubt it. His family is freakishly religious. He probably owns a purity ring."

This did not seem to deter her sister. "I can change his mind."

Lily however, was not so sure. "We'll see about that."

"I suppose we will," Petunia replied. They formally shook hands to seal the deal and Lily couldn't help but feel as if as she had just sold her soul to the devil. With one last withering glare on Petunia's part, Lily bounded up the stairs and careened into her room to finish readying her trunk for the station. But first things first...

She was going to have to change outfits.

* * *

The Hogwarts Express rumbled swiftly through the English countryside as Lily spread out over the compartment bench, exhausted.

"Dumbledore wasn't playing around with this Head Girl business," she said. "It's actually hard work." Between waking up at the crack of dawn to make it to the station in time for her last year at Hogwarts and conducting her first Prefect's meeting, she was about ready to turn in for the day.

Emmeline Vance made a noncommittal noise in reply and shoved another Cauldron Cake into her already full mouth. Lily snorted at her disinterest. "You know James Potter is Head Boy?"

That got her attention.

"You're having me on!" Her blue eyes were so wide she closely resembled a bug. "That would defy all the rules of the universe and Dumbledore does not defy rules."

"His grades are rather top notch, and he's calmed down a lot since fifth year," Lily reasoned.

"But his reputation precedes him." Emmeline grinned wickedly. "This is going to be so much fun. Was it crazy awkward between the two of you at the meeting?"

"Hardly," Lily scoffed. "He barely talked to me at all." It shouldn't have surprised her. Their interactions had been few and far in between since fifth year; He had been too busy being the Lothario of Hogwarts to bother with coaxing her into dating him. Lily didn't think herself to be overly conceited, but she had to admit that it irritated her how quickly he had forgotten her. Though she'd never admit it, it had been nice having such a handsome and popular bloke obsessed with her.

"Bummer," Emmeline said. She pushed her sweets away and leaned forward in excitement. "You'll have to ask him if he really shagged Harriet Pendleton of the Holyhead Harpies over the summer."

Lily wrinkled her nose. "I don't want to know the details about his sex life. Gross. But speaking of shagging, I need your help."

"Er, Lily, I know we're best mates and all but-"

"Bravo. Very funny. But seriously, I have to fuck a bloke before Christmas or suffer humiliation at the hands of my horse-faced sister."

Emmeline cringed a bit at the vulgarity of that statement – Lily had always had an incurably dirty mouth - and tried to keep her overdramatic outbursts to herself as Lily then proceeded to explain the whole debacle.

Lily was initially wary of her friend's reaction. It was not secret that while Lily was more logical about things, Emmeline was hopelessly sentimental. She might not view the whole shagging for competition's sake thing as benign as Lily herself did.

Thankfully, the blonde simply shook her head and said, "How you manage to get yourself into these predicaments, I will never understand."

"You and me both," Lily said dryly. "So you'll help me?"

"Of course," she said instantly, but her face turned thoughtful. "But...don't you, I dunno, want your first time to be special and not part of some stupid bet?"

Lily had seen this coming, and thus was prepared to answer. "It's not a big deal. I might as well get it over with and prove a point to my sister all in one go."

Emmeline picked up another Cauldron Cake and began nibbling on it. "That's not very romantic, though."

Lily shrugged. "I'm not expecting it to be. I'm not like you, Em. I don't need a story-book romance."

Emmeline snorted indelicately. "Fine, whatever, but seeing as I have even less experience than you, we're going to have to consult an expert."

"Dorcas?"

She nodded. "Dorcas."

* * *

Dorcas Meadows a bit infamous among the seventh years. In third year, it was for dating a boy three years above her. In fifth year, it was for losing her virginity. In sixth year, it was for shagging her way through a large portion of the male population of Hogwarts. In short, she was something of a slag. The admirable part about Dorcas, however, was that she was shameless.

This particular trait came in handy when one was in need of advice about the opposite sex, and so that was how Lily found herself sitting on Dorcas's four poster a few hours after the feast in the Great Hall.

"You've come to the right place," Dorcas said, the business-like tone of her voice marred by the mischievous smirk on her face.

"So what should I do?" Lily asked, ignoring the amazed expression on Emmeline's face as she flipped through one of Dorcas's dirty books.

Dorcas considered. "Well normally I'd suggest a very direct plan of attack, but since you're Head Girl, we are going to have to be more discreet."

"Who is actually that flexible?" Emmeline exclaimed, turning the book upside down and squinting, as if the answer would suddenly appear.

"I think you'd be better off choosing one bloke and seducing him with your powers of sexual persuasion," Dorcas said. "That way, you don't get branded a tart for flirting with multiple blokes."

"Okay," Lily laughed. She wasn't sure about this "sexual persuasion" business though. "But who?"

Dorcas leaned back against her headboard. "Your best bet is one of the male slags in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff, preferably Gryffindor."

"There's Henry Reynolds," suggested Emmeline.

"He has a girlfriend," countered Lily. "I need someone who would sleep with me and then forget about it the next day. Someone like..."

"James Potter."

Emmeline choked on her own spit. "What?"

"You heard me," Dorcas said. "James is the master of the one night stand. You know the deal: he hasn't had a girlfriend for more than three months."

"You're serious?" Lily asked. It was strange, but she wasn't entirely opposed to the idea. Maybe the Lily of fifth year would rather have joined a nunnery than shag Potter, but the Lily of seventh year was of an entirely different mindset. Although, he hadn't said more than two words to her at the Prefect meeting during the train ride.

Dorcas shrugged. "He's Head Boy with you, isn't he? Easy access. And don't worry, he's a great shag."

Emmeline let out a high-pitched giggle, but tried to cover it with a cough.

Lily's eyebrows rose. "So you two have shagged then?" She wasn't sure how she felt about that.

Dorcas cackled. "Of course not! We're cousins! But girls do talk, you know."

Lily didn't, but she nodded anyways. "So what should I do? Jump him and get it over with?"

"No, no, no. You need the right environment. Preferably someplace with a lot of alcohol."

"Should I spike his pumpkin juice?" Lily half-joked. She tried to imagine herself drugging him over breakfast, but found it a little too ridiculous. Surely he'd notice?

"Too incriminating," said Dorcas. "I was thinking more like at the party Saturday night."

"Okay." Lily nodded. "I can do that." It didn't seem too difficult, she thought. James was probably planning on shagging some girl after the game anyways. Best of all, everybody in the Common Room would be too busy socializing to notice if they snuck off somewhere.

"Brilliant" Dorcas clapped her hands conclusively. "You'll be a woman of the night in no time."

* * *

The following day marked the first day of what Lily had named "The Seduction of Potter". Though the official seduction itself would take place at the Gryffindor party that Saturday, Lily figured that she was obligated to properly prepare James for the moment when she would throw herself at him.

She had decided that the perfect chance for this would be at the Prefect meeting that evening. It was, however, more difficult than she'd initially thought, as the Prefects were being particularly inquisitive that evening.

"So what's the official ruling on Firewhiskey?" asked a Hufflepuff boy.

"It's been banned since the twenties, as I've told you before," Lily said tiredly.

"So if you're going to be passing it around at any of your _theoretical_ House parties, make sure none of the first years get a hold of it," added James with a grin.

Lily cleared her throat. "If that's all, then sign up for patrols on your way out and we'll see you next week."

_Finally_. She turned to James, who was talking with some sixth year on the Quidditch team. Just as she made a beeline for him, she was intercepted by a mousy-looking fifth year. Blast.

"Er, Lily?"

She tried not to groan. "Yes, Tilden?" The fifteen year old has something of a crush on her and consequently had been all over her at every Prefect meeting they'd had thus far.

He ran a hand through his sandy hair in an attempt to looking dashing, she was sure. Gangly as a beanpole and barely reaching her chin, he was anything but dashing. "So I was hoping we could be partners for patrols?"

Her eyes darted to where James was grabbing his rucksack and preparing to leave. Fuck. "Erm, sorry, Tilden, but I already signed myself up to patrol with James. We're both Heads, you know how it is."

"Well-"

"Speaking of James, I have something urgent I must tell him. G'bye!" With that said, she darted across the room and in front of James, effectively blocking his path to the door.

It only took her a few seconds to realise how stupid she looked. "Yes, Evans?" His eyes sparkled with amusement.

"Erm." She rustled through her rucksack and brought out a well-worn Transfiguration textbook. "You left this in McGonagall's room this morning." Actually, she had _Accio_-ed it out of his dormitory after lessons, but he'd never know the difference.

"I- what?" His brows furrowed in confusion. "I could've sworn I brought it-"

"Well, you probably nicked one of your mates instead," she said hurriedly, eager to get off the subject. "So I signed us up for the best patrol times. Feel free to prostrate yourself before me in thanks."

He chuckled and looked a bit shocked. "You signed us up to patrol together?"

"Somebody has to keep an eye on you, Potter," she said casually. She was surprised that he was so easy to talk to.

He laughed again and she couldn't help but notice that he looked particularly attractive when he was smiling. "Well, if anybody could whip me into shape, it's you Evans. Be gentle though, yeah?"

"I make no promises."

He grinned at her once more before he was pulled into yet another conversation about the Quidditch tactics. If she hadn't been in a room full of people, she would have patted herself on the back. She had successfully flirted with James Potter!

She grinned happily to herself as she shoved the rest of her belongings into her rucksack and prepared to walk back up to the Common Room. Just as she was readying to leave, she froze at the sight of James. He had obviously moved on from his Quidditch conversation was now ruffling his hair and smiling crookedly at a pair of Ravenclaw girls.

Fucking hell! Lily knew he was practically the Lothario of Hogwarts, but she hadn't actually considered that she might have competition for his (sexual) affections. After all, he had fancied her only a few years ago! He obviously hadn't fancied her as much as he had claimed.

She clutched the strap of her rucksack furiously. How dare he act like he was Merlin's gift to witches! He was a cocky, womanising tosser is what he was! A tosser who she was most definitely going to shag, she decided. She was going to shag him and then toss him aside just as he had done to all those other girls.

Lily Evans needed to step up her game.

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To be continued...

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NOTE: I officially love you if you read this thing. I know, it's short and not the best quality, but I've rewritten it so many times that I can't even look at it anymore. Anyways, starting now, if you **review**, then I promise to respond, so feel free to ask questions or whatever floats your boat. I promise to be nice =D. I've already outlined this entire story so updates should be pretty frequent. I'm rambling, I know, so I'll just leave you with this fabulous **review** button...do with it what you will.


	2. Chapter 2

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**THE V WORD**

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_Disclaimer: _Refer to Chapter One.

_Warnings_: The whole shebang.

_Edit:_So as one reviewer pointed out, there wouldn't be a Quiddtich match the first week of school. That's my mistake, I mixed up this story with one of my other ones. Oops. So in this chapter, there is no Quidditch match or anything. I went back and changed the first chapter so that it was just a beginning of the year-type party. So sorry for the mix-up!

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CHAPTER TWO

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Lily stared at the small package of blue pills that Emmeline had unceremoniously dumped onto her breakfast plate.

"Em," she said calmly, "are those what I think they are?"

Emmeline hurriedly shoved them closer towards her. "Take them before someone sees!"

Lily stuffed them into her rucksack and kicked it under the table. "I didn't know you'd taken up drug dealing."

"Sh!" Emmeline hissed, nearly knocking over a goblet of pumpkin juice in her hysteria. "They aren't drugs, they're perfectly safe! I thought you could use them on James to loosen him up at the party without having to force him to drink ten bottles of spiked Butterbeer."

"Where did you even get these?" Lily inquired, her tone more amused than accusatory.

Emmeline looked over her shoulder, as if she expected Dumbledore to pop up from under the table and expel her. "Some Ravenclaw friends. Don't worry, it's totally legitimate."

Lily chewed her eggs thoughtfully as Emmeline tried to compose herself. Her resolve had been strong from the start of this ridiculous bet with Petunia, but she couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about the whole thing. After all, she was Head Girl. What kind of Head Girl went around carrying suspicious blue pills and trying to shag the Head Boy? Not a responsible one, that was for sure.

After breakfast, she spent the entire walk back to Gryffindor Tower poking Emmeline for her spastic behaviour. "They know!" she would hiss, gesturing to an innocent pack of third years. Consequently, Lily was relieved when they finally reached the Common Room. They had a good couple of hours until the start of the rager, which gave Lily ample time to start on her first Charms essay of the year.

_Schoolwork_, she thought practically. _That's exactly the thing to get my mind off of the fact that tonight I'll be having sex with James. _With something akin to a grin, Lily marched up to the dorms.

* * *

When Lily walked down to the Common Room, she instantly regretted spending the afternoon doing _homework_of all things. Why hadn't she taken the time to mentally prepare herself? The party was in full swing and her palms began sweating at the thought of her mission. Trying to be surreptitious, she went to grab a bottle of Butterbeer, scanning the room for James as she weaved through her Housemates.

She took a sip from her bottle and relished the tingle of the fizzy liquid sliding down her throat. Her fingers played with the slippery blue pills in her pocket. It was time to get down to business.

She spotted James over by the fireplace. He was laughing as Peter poured Butterbeer – spiked with Firewhiskey, she was sure – into Sirius's open mouth. Getting him away from his friends was a slight drawback, yes, but one that she had been expecting.

She grabbed another bottle of Butterbeer and inconspicuously shoved a few of Emmeline's capsules into it. She swished the bottle around as the little tablets dissolved and then looked around the crowded room to see if anyone had seen her. The coast was clear and so, two bottles in either hand, she made her way over to the Marauders.

"Having a good time, boys?" she asked, plastering an overly-cheery grin on her face.

"A right good time, Evans," Sirius replied, Butterbeer dribbling down his chin. Clearly, they were inebriated, for they would hardly have been as welcoming had they been completely sober.

She handed the spiked bottle to James. "You looked like you needed a refill."

"Bringing me beverages now, Evans? You better be careful, I might start to get the idea that you actually like me." He grinned in that crooked way of his and Lily was reminded yet again how good-looking he was. Now that she was allowing herself to be attracted to him, she was finding his looks to be more and more distracting.

"Of course I like you, James. You're a very likeable person," she said, tilting her head to the side flirtatiously.

"You should wear trousers like that more often," Sirius said, and Lily was suddenly aware that he was staring at her arse, which was indeed clad in the tightest pair of trousers that she owned.

"And you should fuck off," she replied sweetly. "Wood was looking for the lot of you anyways."

Sirius perked up at that. "Was he? Owes me a galleon, that one. Come on, lads."

The rest of the Marauders made to follow, but Lily quickly put a hand on James's arm. "Have a drink with me, yeah? I hate drinking alone."

He grinned and ruffled his hair. "If you insist."

They sat down on the hearth of the Fireplace. "Let's play a game," Lily suggested. "Have you ever played _I Never_?"

"You're on, Evans."

"I'll go first," she said. "I never received three detentions in one week."

He rolled his eyes and took a sip of Butterbeer. "That was a giveaway, Evans. My turn. I never snuck out after curfew."

They both drank. James looked taken aback. "You? When?"

Lily smiled and rested a hand on his knee. "If you play nice, maybe I'll tell you about it." It was a lame line, but she knew it worked when he stared down at her hand on his knee. She picked up her bottle. "My turn. I never shagged a bloke on the professor's desk." She didn't drink, but she watched him carefully to see if he would.

He laughed. "I don't shag _bloke_s, Evans."

"Cheater!" She socked him in the shoulder and laughed when he pretended to fall over. She noticed that his bottle was more or less empty, which meant that the pills should be kicking in right about now. "Come on," she offered him a hand.

He looked curious, but accepted her hand and let her pull him to his feet. After he was standing, she didn't let go, instead pulling him with her. "Er, Lily?"

She continued pulling him towards the boys' dormitory. "What? I need to escape all this noise and I've never been in the boys' dorms." She couldn't believe she was doing this. Dorcas had definitely warped her mind.

"Why, Evans, are you trying to seduce me?" he said once they made it upstairs. Lily blushed at how accurate statement that was and took a few seconds to drink in the sight of four identical beds all in various states of disarray. It was reasonably messy, but Lily had expected that.

"Which one's yours?" she asked, ignoring his question. She plopped down on the one with the Quidditch posters tacked above it. "This one, right?"

"Your deduction skills are spot on."

She patted the space next to her. "Take a load off."

He cocked his head at her and her heart stopped. He was on to her. "Lily," he said, serious for the first time that night. "What exactly are you trying to do?"

If there any time to be straightforward, it was then. She got up from the bed and advanced toward him, her hands shaking with nerves. She leaned in close, enough to brush her mouth against his ear and run her fingers up and down his back. "I thought we could...get to know each other." Her lips brushed the lobe of his ear with every word.

He pulled away, looking _upset_. Lily was instantly confused. Wasn't he used to this kind of behaviour from girls?

"Listen, Lily, if you're looking for a quick shag, you're not going to get it from me," he said stiffly.

She gaped at him, her cheeks flushing like never before. This, she had definitely not prepared for. "Wha- You aren't exactly famous for saying no!"

"Is that what you-?" He broke off, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I'm not going to sleep with just for- for..."

"James?"

But he was unable to answer, for he promptly fell face first onto his four poster. Lily stared at him dumbly.

"Shit."

* * *

"Is he dead?" Emmeline asked frightfully. Ever since Lily had dragged her upstairs from the Common Room she had been in full-on panic mode.

Lily rolled her eyes. "He's fine. Just passed out. What the fuck were those pills, Emmeline?"

"They said they were light Inebriation Capsules!"

"_They_?"

Emmeline started getting fidgety. "Er, the people I got them from. Y'know, those two Ravenclaw blokes."

Lily burst out laughing. "Those con artists? They've been swindling kids since Third Year! I hope you didn't pay them..."

"I saw them in the courtyard and _they_ came up to me!" Emmeline cried. "How was I supposed to know they were the bloody Artful Dodgers of Hogwarts?"

Lily snorted at the literary reference, but mentally reprimanded herself. It really wasn't a time to be laughing. If one of the Marauders were to walk up the stairs, everything would be ruined. Also, Lily didn't want to think about how awkward it would be to explain why she had decided to drug their best mate.

She sat down on the edge of the bed. "Well, this is shit. What are we supposed to do now?"

Emmeline let out a shaky breath, but seemed to rally. "We could _Enervate_ him."

"And tell him what when he wakes up? Sorry I tried to date-rape you? He'll think I'm cracked." She paused thoughtfully. "Unless he wasn't the only one to pass out..."

Emmeline sighed. "Lily..."

She jumped up from the bed. "No! It's brilliant! If I'm passed out as well we can just say that the Butterbeer was spiked or something!" She danced around giddily. "I swear to Merlin, Em, I'm too genius for my own good!"

"Not genius, diabolical," Emmeline corrected. "I can't believe you're going to drug yourself. How did I get stuck with such a ninny for a best mate? And you're Head Girl to boot! I feel like an enabler or something..."

As Emmeline rambled, Lily fished out her remaining blue capsules and quickly washed them down with a swig of drink. She still had a few minutes until they took full effect, but she needed to act fast.

"So when we go down to the Common Room, I'm going to pretend to faint and you'll have to carry me up to the dorms where I can pass out for real, okay?"

Emmeline flicked her fringe grumpily. "Fine. Let's just get this over with."

"Come along then, my little actress."

* * *

When Lily woke up the next morning, she was aware of two things: First, her head felt as if someone had bashed it against the wall; Second, Dorcas Meadows's face was hovering mere centimetres away from her own.

"Ah!" she screeched, shooting upwards and hitting her skull on her headboard in the process.

Instead of apologising like any normal human being, Dorcas simply cackled. "Your expression! Priceless!"

Lily rubbed the back of her head and glared, feeling particularly crotchety. "I'm glad you're amused."

"Not as amused as I was when I heard about your little exploits last night!" Dorcas said excitedly. "It's a shame that I missed it all! If only Tom didn't have such a spectacular mouth..."

Lily held up a hand. "Okay, I'm going to stop you right there." The after-effects of whatever narcotic she had taken was already making her nauseous.

Dorcas shook her head and began clicking her tongue. "You can't be such a prude if you want to be a proper woman of the night."

She threw up her hands. "I don't think it matters, now that everything has gone to shit!"

"Now, now," Dorcas said. "It wasn't all that bad."

"But it was!" Lily replied. "His exact words were: 'If you're looking for a quick shag, you won't get it from me!'"

"Oh."

"Yes, _oh_," Lily said. "He obviously finds me repulsive. Who knew that James Potter had such high standards?"

Dorcas waved her away. "No, no. That's not what I meant at all. This has nothing to do with standards. It's a lot more serious than that."

It was a bit irritating the way Dorcas knew so much more than her, but she played along anyway. "What are you on about?"

Dorcas had a strange, contemplative look on her face. "I think we're going to have to take a new angle to this 'Seduce Potter' mission."

Lily collapsed back against her pillows dramatically. "Like what? Giving me Polyjuice so that I'm a completely different person?"

"Better than that." Dorcas grinned, a chilling sight given what she was capable of. "You, my slag-in-training, are going to become James Potter's new girlfriend."

Lily immediately dissolved into hysterical laughter. "D-did you miss the part where he rejected my offer to fuck his brains out? What makes you think he'd want to date me?" Even without the added factor of his rejection, the idea was just too funny. Her and James? _Dating_? Holding hands in the corridors and kissing before lessons? No, just...no.

Dorcas hit her with a pillow. "I'm serious. I don't know what James's deal is, but it seems he isn't in to the casual shagging thing anymore. If you want him to shag you, you're going to have to properly date him first."

_Properly date James Potter._

A year ago – a week ago, even – the prospect would have seemed ludicrous. They could barely have a five minute conversation without arguing with one another. But now... she couldn't pinpoint when (maybe when she'd agreed to lose her virginity to him) or why (maybe because she was finding him more and more attractive), but the idea...it didn't disgust her. It didn't exactly make her want to do pirouettes about the room either, but she was certainly intrigued.

"How do you know James would even date me?" she asked.

Dorcas shrugged, as if the whole thing was obvious. "He may not be into casual shagging now, but he's still James Potter. All this Head Boy business must have gone to his head. He's probably trying to clean up his act now, be honourable or some other bollocks," she said, scrunching up her nose at the _honourable_ bit as if such a thing was some kind of moral offence. "But from what I gather, it wasn't _you_ he was opposed to, so if you play it right, you can still get this to work in your favour. All right?

Lily remembered how she had felt at the Prefect meeting when he had been blatantly flirting with all those other girls. She had wanted to crush him like a bug and, in the process, crush her sister as well. If she went through with these dating shenanigans, well...she could still do just that.

"All right," she said. "I'm in."

* * *

Sitting down in the Great Hall for breakfast after everything that had happened the previous night was not nearly as terrible as she had anticipated. The story of the tampered Butterbeer had spread fast, and Lily had found herself, funnily enough, being the object of sympathy frommany of her fellow Gryffindors.

"Poor thing," Mary MacDonald was saying over a plate of eggs. "I know how it feels to be slipped something. Every time my potion came out black in Slug's class, I knew it was obvious someone had tampered with it. Parkinson, I suspect. He's always had it out for me."

Lily nodded in agreement, though she highly suspected that her blackened mixtures were more of a result of her abysmal Potions skills than any actual foul play.

Mary, however, was the least of her worries. If there was any group of people that she needed sympathy from, it was the Marauders. So when she saw the lot of them (minus James) file into the Great Hall, she bid Mary goodbye and sat down next to them.

"So is James okay?" she asked carefully. "I heard he, er, had a bad night as well."

To her immense relief, Sirius waved her off. "That prat? He's fine. What I'm more interested in is what in the devil is going on between the two of you."

Lily nearly spat her pumpkin juice all over his pretty face. "Er, say what?"

Sirius, who appeared to be enjoying himself, leaned backwards cockily. "Don't play coy, Miss Evans. I saw how it was at the party last night. You were all too happy to get him alone."

There was nothing else for it: they were on to her. There was nothing left to do except...

"Fine then, I might fancy him a bit. All right?"

Sirius looked even more amused at this bit of news, which threw Lily off slightly. What was his deal? The other Marauders, however, were fractionally more surprised.

"You – really?" Remus set down his paper in shock as Peter dropped the fork that had previously been aiding him in his efforts to shovel an entire plate of sausages into his mouth.

"Yes," Lily said, then her voice took on a more threatening edge, "but you can't tell him, or I'll make sure that your arses are in detention everyday for the rest of the month."

Well, Lily thought as she took in their expressions, which ranged from lazily amused to frightened, this blackmail business isn't all that bad. In fact, she was actually sort of enjoying herself.

Remus, who had recovered from his prior shock and seemed to have resigned himself to being unaffected, went back to his newspaper while Sirius waved her away. "Fine, I'll acknowledge your swotty little threats, Evans, but only because of the endless enjoyment I'll get from watching the two of you cock this up."

Lily wasn't sure she _liked_ the smug tone Sirius was using, as if he knew something she didn't, but she wasn't about to pass up this offer.

"Good, so we have an understanding," she said formally. "And don't think I won't find out if you go back on your word. I'd hate to have to sic Dorcas on the lot of you."

It was a loaded threat, and Lily was pleased to see Peter shudder in fright. Sirius, though his poker face was impenetrable, seemed to get the message as well. "Yes, yes, you'll have our cocks if we spill the beans, we get it."

She flashed them a charming smile. "It's a pleasure doing business with you gentlemen."

She skipped past the doors of the Great Hall, feeling particularly pleased with herself. Perhaps she would treat herself to an extra large Cauldron Cake from her secret stash back in the dorms.

"Lily, wait!"

She turned, the smile still one her face, to see Tilden careen past the Hall doors. "Yes, Tilden?"

The faux-suave look that he usually wore when he was around her had been replaced by a strange, suspicious one. "I saw you at the party last night."

"Er, I saw you too, Tilden. We are, after all, in the same House." Honestly, she had no time for this! She was going to have to convince Potter to be her boyfriend and eventually deflower her; she needed to plan!

"No," he said, looking around to see if there was anybody loitering. There wasn't. "I saw _what you did_. To that bottle of Butterbeer. I saw you slip something into it."

Lily froze. This was not happening. She had made sure that nobody was looking when she'd slipped those pills into Potter's drink. There was no way he could have seen her. Except...the look on his face said that he had indeed seen her. "That was my medication," she said quickly. "It's nothing serious of course, but-"

"Then why did you give _your medication_ to James Potter?"

Shit. She was so dead.

"How much is your silence going to cost me?" she asked, feeling very much like a mobster from one of her dad's favourite films.

The look on his face was positively devious. "Nothing...for the time being. You can rest assured that we will be in touch, though."

_Lord_. "Fine, but until then..." Lily made slashing motions about her throat that made it very clear that he best keep quiet. He gave her a mock-salute before scampering back into the Great Hall.

Lily breathed a sigh of relief. It was honestly comical the amount of trouble she had gotten herself into ever since she had set her sights on James Potter. It begged the question: What other problems would this suicide mission bring about?

* * *

To be continued...

* * *

Note:

So this chapter came out later than I initially planned due to me being out of town and getting sick, but it's finally here! It's pretty much unedited since I wanted to post it as soon as possible, but whatever, I can edit it later. Anyways, what I really wanted to say was THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! Seriously, you guys completely made my week! I never expected to get such a strong response to this, but I guess you guys liked it so I really hope this chapter doesn't disappoint you. I'll try to update next week, but...we'll see how that goes. Ramblings aside...hit that button down there and **tell me what you think**!


	3. Chapter 3

**Note from the guilty: **I'm the absolute worst updater, I know. I considered abandoning this because, let's face it, it isn't the best story out there, but I have some later stuff written that I actually like so I thought I'd keep it going if any poor souls out there still want to read it (_anyone?_). This chapter was written an eternity ago so roll with it and I'll try and get out a better quality chapter 4 ASAP. If any of you have held on for this long, you are my heros.

* * *

**CHAPTER THREE**

* * *

She debated using a memory modifying charm. She considered claiming that someone had impersonated her with Polyjuice Potion. She even pondered giving up all together. In the end, she decided that the best course of action would be to man the hell up and confront him herself.

That was how she found herself scouring the corridors at some ungodly early-bird hour of the morning for the infamous Quidditch Captain. She knew he had Quidditch practise at the crack of dawn, but when exactly that practise ended was a glorified mystery. And so, she spent an indeterminable amount of time pacing around outside the Great Hall in hopes that he would hurry up and put her out of her misery.

When she finally caught sight of an unruly head of hair, she nearly fell over with relief. He was shouldering his broom and, Lily was quick to notice, alone. She immediately made a beeline for him.

"Well hullo there, Captain." She flashed him a grin.

"Up a bit early, aren't you, Evans?" he returned, his signature lazy grin sliding across his face. She noticed that his hair was damp from what she presumed to be his after-practise shower.

She quickly tried for something clever. "Early worm catches the bird! Or...er...some rubbish about worms." Wonderful. She was sure her cheeks were a brilliant shade of red now. She fully blamed the intoxicating soapy smell that he was emanating for making her so scatter-brained.

"Wise words, Evans," he said, looking infuriatingly amused.

There was only one way to turn this around. She forced a laugh. "Sorry, I'm still a bit out of sorts from the other night. Whatever was in my drink must've been _really_ strong, I barely remember a thing. If I did anything strange, you have to promise not to hold it against me." She looked up at him through her eyelashes like the heroines in trashy romance novels were always doing - not that she read those of course.

He ruffled the back of his head and grinned at her. "Don't worry about it," he said. She mentally breathed a sigh of relief. "But hopefully you're not too knackered. We have rounds tonight."

_Oh right_. "Blimey, I'd completely forgotten about that." She smiled at him flirtatiously. "It's a good thing I ran into you then."

"Somebody has to keep you in line," he replied easily.

She rolled her eyes. "Prat. I'll meet you in the Common Room later, yeah?"

"I'm counting down the seconds."

She shook her head and smiled an "I can't believe I associate with this loony" smile, but secretly, Lily couldn't help from thinking that she too was counting down the seconds until their next encounter.

* * *

. . .

* * *

"Why are you grinning like that?" Emmeline demanded the instant Lily sat down at their usual table for Divination lessons.

Lily quickly contorted her face into what she hoped was a serious, ready-for-class expression. "Who's grinning?"

"Now you just look pinched. You probably should have avoided those sausages at breakfast."

"If you're quite done," Lily snapped, "I'd like to take my Divination notes in peace."

Emmeline waved her off. "Don't be silly, class hasn't even started yet. So did you talk to James?" She emphasised her question with a prod from her quill. "Did you?" _Prod, prod._

"Will you quit it?" Lily shrieked, then, lowering her voice, "Yes, I talked to him, alright?"

"And?"

"And what? The air is cleared and I'm once again good to charm the pants off the bloke, which I fully intend to do tonight at rounds." She finished this with a cheeky smile and then bent over to search through her rucksack.

"Ambitious," Emmeline said. Lily heard the crinkle of parchment. "Speaking of rounds Tilden-what's-his-face wanted me to give you this note. Prefect business, I presume?"

"What?" Lily started, bumping her head on the table before straightening and casting a wary look at the folded bit of parchment. "Er, yes, Prefect business." She quickly snatched the note off the table and only when Emmeline got up to get the teacups did she read it.

_Meet me outside the Great Hall before lunch. Don't be late._

Lily rolled her eyes. Who did this kid think he was, Lord Voldemort? It was beyond insulting to be bossed about by some fifth year - she was Head Girl, after all - but it couldn't be helped. She spent the rest of morning lessons mentally bemoaning the fact that she was probably the only Head Girl daft enough to become embroiled in a blackmailing scheme.

Lunch could not have come any sooner. "I'll catch up later," she told Emmeline, before discreetly getting lost in the mix of students off to the Great Hall. Tilden wasn't hard to find - in fact, his attempts at subterfuge actually made him all the more conspicuous. He was leaning up against a column outside the Hall, glancing left and right in a wholly suspicious manner.

It took a Herculean effort to drag herself over there, but once she did, Lily got straight to the point. "What's this going to cost me? Help with your homework? First pick for rounds scheduling? I categorically refuse to sneak you into the girls' dorms, so if-"

"I want you to be my girlfriend."

"-that's your...wait. What?"

"I want you to be my girlfriend," he repeated.

"Gross! You're like twelve years old!" Lily blurted. This had to be a joke. Any minute now the Marauders would pop out from around the corner reveal the whole gag. Not that they would ever pull something this stupid. But still.

Tilden looked offended. "I turn sixteen in May."

Lily took a deep breath mentally called upon the powers of all the previous Head Girls. "Isn't there someone else in fifth year you could date? Why would you want to date me anyway?"

He rolled his eyes at her ignorance. "Please. You're Head Girl and the foxiest bird in Gryffindor. All my roommates fancy you. If I landed you, I'd be legend!"

Lily choked on her own spit. The _foxiest_? "Listen," she said. "I'm flattered, really, but I'm sure you don't want a girlfriend you had to force into dating you. Quite frankly, it's kind of creepy."

He shrugged. "I don't care." He shot her an evil grin. "Besides, you kind of owe me."

Any feelings of flattery or sympathy went right out the door. "If you think you can just..." she trailed off. The fact of the matter was that he _could_ "just". It was either that or her secret identity as a drug-yielding loon would be revealed. "For fuck's sake! Fine, whatever, I'll be your girlfriend." What else could she do?

He grinned. "Brilliant!"

"But I'm not snogging you!" she added.

He actually had the nerve to look disappointed. "But, that's not very authentic looking then, is it?"

"What would you know?" Lily countered. "If you have to resort to blackmail to get dates you obviously don't have experience with girls!"

"Alright, alright, we won't snog!" She was temporarily appeased, but not for long. "You have to at least walk me to lunch."

She immediately bristled. "I don't _have_ to do anything, you little-"

"That's okay. I'll just go and have a nice little chat with your mate James Potter. I'm sure he'd love to know what was in a certain bottle of Butterbeer he happened to have consumed courtesy of the Head Girl." He pretended to walk away.

"That won't be necessary," Lily said, grabbing him by the arm and practically dragging him to the Great Hall. She led him, beaming, to the Gryffindor table and almost forced him down into his seat by the rest of the fifth years.

"Will you be joining us?" he smirked. Lily had to restrain herself from slamming his head onto the table.

"I'm afraid I have some revising to do before rounds tonight," she said tightly. She gave a half-hearted wave and stalked away without waiting for his reply.

In the face of distress, Lily found that the only logical place to go was the library. Her inner-swot could find comfort in the musty old-book smell permeating the room and the relative quietness always facilitated some of her best thinking. She plopped down at her favourite corner table, took a deep breath, and allowed her mind to wander.

She was feeling rather philosophical and zen-like with all her silent reflecting, but she was also bored as hell. Thinking, it turned out, sucked. She spent more time examining her fingernails and watching a pack of third year boys stick their quills to the ceiling than any actual reflecting.

She was just about to inform the third years of the wonders of a simple Levitation charm when something by the shelves caught her eye.

It was Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew. They were huddled conspiratorially over, strangely enough, a rather hefty tomb, whispering about something and gesturing with their wands to certain passages in the text. It appeared to be quite innocent behaviour for the pair of miscreants, but the mere sight of them sparked something in her brain.

If she didn't have a solution to her problems, she just might know someone who would.

* * *

. . .

* * *

"I need you to help me with something."

James Potter shot her an exasperated look. "I _am_ helping! Just because I didn't take points from Randalls doesn't mean-"

"Not with rounds!" Lily said, feeling a bit exasperated herself. "With something else. Something...more up your alley, shall we say." She had been trying to build up to her request since meeting up with him in Common Room for rounds, but after twenty minutes of patrolling the corridors and chatting about everything except anything pertaining to revenge and blackmailers, she decided to take a more direct approach.

"Up my alley?" He shot her a look that could only be described as wicked. Lily suppressed the strange urge to shiver. "Why, Evans, just what are you suggesting?"

She knew she had him then so the need to be mysterious was significantly less crucial. "I need you to help me take down someone."

James promptly burst into laughter.

"Would you - It's not that funny!" She put her hands on her hips and glared her most menacing Head Girl glare. Although, it was hard to emit the proper waves of disapproval with James laughing all deep and charmingly.

"S-sorry," he said, still chuckling. "But you should listen to yourself. 'Take down someone', like we're in a western film or something."

"What would you know about western films?" Lily snapped, though she knew it was a weak comeback. Honestly, you'd think a boy that was so infamous for his troublemaking would be easier to cajole into causing actual trouble. "Anyways, this is serious business. There are lives at stake here!"

Alright, that wasn't exactly true, but whatever.

James made a valiant attempt at keeping a straight face. "I apologise. Please, elaborate on this takedown."

"Well, since you insisted," she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder and attempting to look as dignified as possible. "Let's just say that a certain someone...has something on me and since you're such a brilliant, caring, respectable bloke with experience in such things, I figured you could help me out of this perilous situation." She gave him her best damsel-in-distress expression.

He shook his head in disbelief at her. "I can't believe you're asking me to help you get revenge on someone. Lily Evans, have you always been so naughty?" He rested a hand against the wall near her head and leaned over her with a gaze that looked exceptionally, as he would say, _naughty_.

Oh, Merlin. How was she supposed to think with him leaning over her like that?

"Maybe you're rubbing off on me," she managed. She cursed herself for saying the word rubbing, though, because she was instantly assaulted with a barrage of mental pictures about rubbing and a certain Head Boy.

Perhaps she was still drugged. It was the only explanation for why she could hear her blood roaring in her ears as she inclined her head closer to his. She could almost feel his breath on her lips.

And then he was gone. Her plans of giving Dorcas the play-by-play flew right out the window.

"Are you coming?"

She shook off her disappointment and realised he was waiting for her to follow him down the corridor. "Where are we going?"

He shook his head at her in mock-exasperation. "Revenge, blackmail...ringing any bells?"

"Lead the way."

* * *

. . .

* * *

"I don't get it," Lily said.

She knew that when it came to troublemaking James was clearly her superior, but she could not fathom the significance of their presence in the fifth year boys' dormitory. She wasn't sure what infiltrating Tilden's place of slumber would accomplish and frankly, the smell was getting to her.

"What are we going to do, set fire to his bedsheets?"

"Think of the house elves, Evans," James said disapprovingly as he began kicking aside piles of assorted junk. "Make yourself useful, will you? Look for something we can counter-blackmail the little bugger with."

She rolled her eyes. "Counter-blackmail?"

"Honestly, Evans," he said, voice muffled from poking his head under Tilden's four-poster, "this is textbook stuff."

She ignored his quip and looked pointedly at the door. "Er, won't they walk in on us any second now? It's almost after curfew."

She couldn't see his face, but she could just tell that he had rolled his eyes. "What fifth year boy do you know that goes to bed exactly at curfew?"

"Point taken." She kicked her way across the dormitory, taking extra pains to avoid any undergarments or sticky substances. She flipped open a book on one of the nightstands and found Tilden's name scrawled in the corner. "Well, I found his bed."

James took his head out of the wardrobe. "Brilliant. Let's check under the mattress." He joined her by the bed and made quick work of lifting up the mattress.

"I'm going to be sick," Lily said, prodding aside the cache of dirty magazines. She ignored James's snicker and snatched the red leather-bound journal that was among the rubble. "Score one for Gryffindor!"

James snickered. "Was that supposed to be a Quidditch reference?"

Lily ignored him and thumbed through the journal. "'Today I saw up Penelope's skirt in Charms...' This boy is a bloody perv!"

"Let me see that," James said, swiping it out of her hands. "Look he even mentions you: 'Lily Evans has the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. If only she would look at me the way she looks at James Potter.'"

"It does _not_ say that!" She tried to grab it from him but he twisted away from her hands.

"This bit was written only a few days ago. 'Gryffindor had a party and I saw the most peculiar thing-'"

"I think that's enough for now," she said before making a panicked lunge for the book and shoving it into the dark depths of her bag. "Obviously, we have our leverage."

James opened his mouth to retort, but before he could say anything the door knob turned and Lily instinctively pulled him under Tilden's bed with her. She could make out a pair of black shoes stepping over a pile dirty clothes. She stifled a laugh and suffered a jab to the ribs courtesy of James. She turned her head to face him, prepared to give him the deadliest of glares but instead found herself nearly nose to nose with the boy. She promptly stopped breathing.

Lily was barely aware of the sound of footsteps, or the sound of anything other than her heart thrashing about in her chest. Her lips were mere inches aware from James's and if she only leaned forward just a bit, they would be kissing. She knew she could not be imagining the delicious tension between them because James was staring at her lips. She was going to make a move, she was going to kiss him!

Except it was at that moment that the door slammed and James rolled out from under the bed so fast he was gone before she had registered what happened.

"Quick, before he returns," he whispered, jumping to his feet.

Lily rolled out from under the musty confines as gracefully as possible and tried not to feel rejected. She straightened her skirt more to avoid eye contact with James than any concern for her personal appearance. When she finally had the courage to look up at him, she noticed his cheeks were a bit flushed. She patted her bag and nodded. "I've got the book, let's go."

Before he could respond, she was grabbing his hand and dragged him out the door. She checked to see that the boys' stairwell was clear before turning to him. "So what do we do now?"

James casually slid his hand out of her grasp and Lily tried her hardest not to let her disappointment show. Was she really that repulsive? "The best way to go about it now is to show him your hand, make him sweat. Then you can start rolling out the demands."

"Hmm, I quite like the sound of that."

He gave her a sly grin. "I think I've created a monster."

"You better watch out," she said with a confident hair flip. "I just might give you a run for your money with this whole troublemaking business."

"Let's not get carried away..."

"You watch, someday it'll be _you_ coming to _me_ for help with your latest revenge plan."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm sure."

They had reached the beginnings of the girls' stairwell. Lily was almost sad to see him go. "Well," she said. "I guess this is where I leave you."

He gave her a nod of assent. "I trust you can take it from here."

She gave him a mock salute and a jaunty grin. "I'll be sure to provide a full report of my inevitable success." He chuckled and she was seized by a sudden idea. She leaned forward a planted a kiss on his cheek. "Thanks for your help today!" She waggled her fingers at him and ascended the stairs without chancing a look at his face.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER FOUR**

* * *

"This is hopeless," Lily groaned, rolling over on her four-poster and burying her head in her pillow.

It was late in the afternoon on a Sunday and Emmeline was trying, and failing, to get Lily to see the light of day.

"You can't just give up," Emmeline persisted. At the beginning of the day she had left Lily to her misery but when she realized that the redhead had no plans to leave the Common Room that day she had immediately taken to being, in Lily's humble opinion, as irritating as possible.

Lily lifted her head up enough to roll her eyes in her friend's direction. "Why not? I can't get Potter to be my boyfriend, how am I supposed to get him to shag me? I'm better off just shagging Tilden, my blackmailer."

Emmeline wrinkled her nose. "I'm not quite sure that's legal, and if it is, it shouldn't be."

"Maybe I should just call the whole thing with Tuney off. This was a dumb idea in the first place." She was briefly assaulted by the memory of Potter rolling out from under the bed to avoid her seductions. He couldn't have gotten away fast enough.

Emmeline pounced on Lily's bed so suddenly the redhead almost rolled off in surprise. "You can't be serious! We've come so far already. I aided and abetted you in drugging the Head Boy!"

"You can't be sent to Azkaban for trying to seduce a bloke, Em," Lily said.

"That's not the point!" Emmeline shrieked, verging on hysterical now. "You've made me a criminal and now you're telling me it was all for naught! It's a slippery slope! I'm destined for a life of crime now. The next thing you know I'll be holding up Gringotts and-"

"Okay, okay!" Lily laughed. "I won't give up if it means so much to you. But I need a new plan of action."

Emmeline took a deep breath, seeming to recover from her earlier hysterics. "That's easy enough, we just have to look at this a different way."

"What do you mean?" Lily asked.

"Well, we've been looking at this the Dorcas Way, and she's used to a certain type of guy if you know what I mean." Lily snickered. "James apparently doesn't go around shagging just anyone. You need to start smaller and work your way up."

It was funny because Lily had always assumed that James was exactly "that type of guy". What had happened to him?

Lily pondered. "Do you mean like…a kiss?"

"Exactly," Emmeline proclaimed, looking a bit like a mad professor what with her rumpled hair and _I've-solved-it_ expression.

Lily brightened and patted her friend's cheek affectionately. "You are a splendid bird, Em."

It was kind of risky, kissing Potter. She had no idea how he would react and the very thought of it made her palms sweaty with anxiety, but it was the best way to tell if she had a shot at anything more with him. Sure, should he reject her it was only her reputation on the line, but, Lily reasoned, she never much cared what Potter thought about her before so it made little sense to care what he thought of her now.

Now all she needed was an opportunity.

* * *

. . .

* * *

Quidditch.

She'd thought long and hard about it and had come to the conclusion that the answer was Quidditch. James Potter was the Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team; James Potter liked Quidditch. Thus, if she was going to seduce Potter, she figured her best chances would be on the Quidditch pitch.

It was a brilliant plan, really. Potter would be high on endorphins from practice and probably in the best state of mind possible for what she had planned. It was certainly annoying, dragging herself out of bed a whole hour earlier than usual just so she could make it to the Pitch in time to accost him after practice, but sacrifices had to be made.

Lily cackled a bit evilly to herself and was thankful that her position behind the stands obscured her more manic behaviour from the people on the field. She'd been watching for a solid twenty minutes already and was starting to get a bit antsy.

_Yes, finally. _James had mercifully called them all to the ground and they were huddling around him as he talked. She noticed he used a lot of hand gestures while he spoke and that his sweat had caused his hair to stick up at the back more than usual. It was not unattractive.

The huddle broke apart then and Lily saw James throw his broom over his shoulder and follow the rest of the team in the direction of the locker room. It was now or never.

"James!"

He looked downright shocked to see her bounding across the Pitch towards him, which gave Lily a bit of a thrill, as he was normally so composed.

"Er, Lily, is everything alright?" She supposed his first instinct was that she had come due to some sort of urgent Head business.

She smiled, perhaps a bit manically, and said, "Everything's fine, I just fancied a chat with my favourite Quidditch player."

"Your favourite, am I?" he returned, but he looked perplexed as he shifted his broom to the other shoulder.

She batted her eyelashes and cocked her head to the side so that her hair slid over one shoulder. "Why, of course, James." She wondered if she was supposed to feel this idiotic. How did some girls do this kind of rubbish on a regular basis?

"Well, I knew you couldn't resist my charms for long," he joked as they walked nearer the entrance to the locker rooms. They stopped underneath the stands and James's face took on a more serious look, "Lily, what exactly are you _mmph_-"

She went for it.

She realised later that perhaps she had been a bit too enthusiastic about the whole thing, what with her more or less pushing him against the wall of the stands in such a way that his head most definitely made contact with the surface behind it, but she reasoned that the kiss itself made up for it – because it was a good kiss, a _very_ good kiss.

Her lips moved over his, roughly at first, but then softer as they both relaxed into it. He didn't kiss her back per se, but he did open his mouth to her so that she could sweep her tongue over his and gently suck on it. She did so for more than a few moments, until she realised with a sickening jolt how entirely caught up she'd gotten and how she almost didn't want to stop.

She carefully leaned back and detached her lips from his with what she was sure was a blush of epic proportions. He was panting somewhat and his eyes looked a bit hazy, which she took as a good sign. He opened his mouth to speak but she beat him to it:

"Will you be my boyfriend?"

* * *

. . .

* * *

It wasn't until she sat down for dinner in the Great Hall the following evening that she fully realized the gravity of the situation.

"Alright, Evans? You look a bit off," Dorcas, who had taken the seat across from her, remarked as she piled her plate. Before she could respond, Dorcas continued, "Did Potter reject you then? Emmeline told me about your plan. Not the way I'd go about it, of course, but I could understand why you-"

"No, no, he didn't reject me," Lily interrupted before Dorcas could rant any further.

Dorcas halted her spooning of more than a few potatoes onto her plate, looking surprised. "Really? Then why do you look so depressed? I don't know about you but after a good session with a bloke I'm usually in higher spirits."

Lily wrinkled her nose. "I'm not sure what you mean by a _session_, but I can assure you we didn't have one."

"Now, now, Trudy Prudey. If you want to unleash your inner woman you're going to have to be a bit more open-minded than that. But I repeat, what's with the sour face?"

Lily looked over both shoulders to make sure the coast was clear before answering. "Potter said yes! I asked him to be my boyfriend and he said _yes_. I'm dating Potter. Potter and I are dating!" Her mind flashed briefly to the moment under the stands after she had kissed him and his quick, breathless reply of acquiescence before they went their separate ways. _Had that actually happened?_

Dorcas blinked. "You probably could've stopped after 'Potter said yes', but alright, you're dating. What's the problem?"

"The problem," Lily said, her voice growing a bit frantic, "is that I'm now Potter's girlfriend. I have no idea how to be Potter's girlfriend! What am I supposed to do now? Why did he even agree to date me? We've barely spent any alone time together aside from Heads business! Was he joking? Is this some kind of-"

This time it was Dorcas's turn to interrupt. "Evans, get a grip! I swear to Merlin you're turning into Emmeline. You don't need to panic, this is a good thing. Now that Potter is your boyfriend you're that much closer to getting into his trousers. In fact, it's pretty much guaranteed at this point. All you have to do now is be a good girlfriend, maybe seduce him a bit, and he'll be shagging your brains out in due time."

The conjuring of _that_ image made her feel a bit weak, but everything else Dorcas said was actually soothing. Be a good girlfriend. All right, she could do that. Granted, she hadn't exactly had a boyfriend since fourth or fifth year, but how hard could it actually be? As much as she was pained to admit it, being nice and acting interested in James wasn't much of a chore, or an act for that matter. No, she wasn't in love with James and she was fairly certain that had it not been for the bet with her sister, she would have gone on treating James exactly the same as she always had. Despite their somewhat rocky past, Potter was an attractive bloke and generally pleasant to be around, at least lately, so dating him might actually be, dare she think it, fun.

"You're right," Lily said.

It was then that the Marauders ambled in to the Great Hall. Lily was immediately nervous. She tried to appear as casual as possible despite the added annoyance of Dorcas' lecherous grins and nudgings under the table.

"Cut that out," she hissed, right before the lot of them plopped down in the seats next to her. She turned to the messy haired boy now seated adjacent to her. "Hullo there," she grinned.

She was terrified it was going to be awkward or that he was going to tell her agreeing to date her had been one big laugh. Instead he gave her thigh a gentle squeeze and smiled before looking over at Dorcas curiously. "Why do you look so devious, Meadows? Did you steal somebody's boyfriend again?"

"Oh ha _ha_, that happened one time! And this is far from my devious look, Potter. If you ever have the misfortune to be on the tail end of _that_ you know you're in for trouble. Lily here could tell you more about that though, in fact she's-"

"Ignore her, I think someone spiked her pumpkin juice - probably the girl whose boyfriend she stole," Lily quickly interjected accompanied by a swift kick under the table. She picked up some food to ply him with, "Did you get some of the pudding?"

"Er, no." He looked amused as she piled some onto his plate.

This wasn't so bad, the whole girlfriend thing. James was actually making it quite easy, and he kept smiling at her in this really adorable way – but anyways she was starting to feel a lot better about the whole thing. But she noticed he still had yet to kiss her. Not that she expected him to start snogging her in front of the whole Great Hall, but still, a small kiss hello would have done. They were dating now! How were they going to shag if he refused to kiss her?

She didn't know why she was suddenly so fixated on this but it seemed important. Maybe it was because when she had attacked him with her mouth earlier he hadn't really had time to reciprocate. Whatever the reason it was making her anxious. It was time to take action.

"Are we still doing rounds tonight?" she asked casually, while slipping her hand onto the top of his closest thigh. James coughed into his goblet of pumpkin juice.

"Er, rounds?" Lily had started gently running her hand up and down his thigh. "No, er, the Hufflepuffs are covering tonight." His cheeks had turned a bit red.

"Oh, blast, I thought we'd signed up for this evening." She briefly paused her ministrations to fix him with a pouty look.

He seemed to regain his composure a bit and gave her an amused smile. "Why do you seem upset – you hate rounds!"

She leaned in closer to him, so that only he could hear and simultaneously inched her hand higher up his leg. "I was looking forward to spending some alone time with you."

He breathed heavily and moved forward just enough so that his lips brushed hers with every word he spoke. "You're trouble, Evans. I must be rubbing off on you."

Merlin, they were practically kissing! She didn't even care that they were in the Great Hall and most likely had many an audience member. Her lips were tingling with the need to be snogged and she was just about ready to grab him by his shirttail and lay one on him, audience be damned.

"What is this?!"

Lily snapped out of her trance and looked behind her to find an irate Tilden looking like a lover scorned.

"Er, Tilden, did you need something?" she tried to get her breathing back under control. Damn that Potter and her inability to breathe around him!

"Need something? What I need is for my _girlfriend_ to not be flinging herself-"

Lily instantly jumped up from her seat and choked out hurriedly, "Tilden, you're talking nonsense. Someone must've put some type of hex on you. Let's sort this out outside, shall we?"

A snort escaped from Dorcas's side of the table and Lily tossed her a withering glare before giving an amused-looking James a quick kiss on the check and dragging Tilden by the arm through the doors of the Great Hall.

"Did you just give Potter a kiss? Right in front of me, no less," he was ranting.

Lily rolled her eyes and reached into her bag. "Unless you want Penelope to find out how familiar you are with her undergarments, I'd cool it with the jealous boyfriend bit." She waved the journal in front of him.

He instantly turned magenta. "How the devil did you – you went through my room?" He tried snatching it out of her hands but she had the advantage of height and simply held it higher.

"Don't think I didn't make copies. I could very easily post my favourite excerpts around the school."

He gave up trying to the grab the notebook and seemed to accept the reality of the situation. "Fine, I'm assuming our relationship is over then. But for the record _I _dumped _you_."

Maybe James really was rubbing off on her, she was feeling inspired. "If you say one word about us having any type of relationship, I'll pair you with Gertrude for rounds until the end of the year."

"Fine," he threw his arms up in defeat. "You win!"

Lily grinned. She could almost understand why the Marauders took such joy in troublemaking – it was quite the high! "Brilliant! And not one word to James about the incident from the other night or I'll go public. It's a pleasure doing business with you." She waggled her fingers at him.

When she returned to the Gryffindor table she met James's raised eyebrows with her brightest smile. "It's sorted, just a stupid hex someone put on him. Good thing I'm handy with charms!"

"That's not the only thing you're handy with," Dorcas quipped. Lily chose to ignore whatever _that_ meant and returned to her pudding. She was half-afraid that James would question her more about the Tilden debacle considering he knew a bit of the backstory. Luckily he seemed absorbed in his shepherd's pie and trying to levitate bits of dinner roll into Sirius's opened mouth.

At one point he paused from his activities to rest a hand on her back and rub it tenderly. Dorcas caught this action and they locked eyes. She raised her eyebrows at Lily and Lily raised hers back at Dorcas. She could tell Dorcas was impressed and perhaps a bit surprised at her progress.

She was officially one step closer to winning James's heart.

* * *

To be continued...


End file.
